


Pidgeon

by Blurry_Face



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/M, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-26
Updated: 2017-03-02
Packaged: 2018-09-02 07:42:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8658400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blurry_Face/pseuds/Blurry_Face
Summary: “Shiro?!” She was met with darkness as her eyes tried to hurriedly readjust to the new environment. It didn’t take long for her to find Shiro thrashing in his bed with the sheets strewn everywhere. “Shiro! Shiro, wake up it’s only a dream. No one’s going to hurt you.” She approached his bed slowly so as not to spook him. She held out her hand to lightly shake his shoulder to try to wake him from his nightmare. Bad Idea.Pidge walks in on Shiro during one of his darker moments. What will this do to the relationship between the Black and Green Paladins? (Will contain gore and maybe some triggering moments). Eventual Pidge/Shiro and some Keith/Pidge friendship.





	1. Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hello everyone! This is my first Voltron fanfic and I'm really excited for the story I have planned in my head! It's gonna be great! Also I use female pronouns for Pidge in this story, enjoy!

She let out a yawn as her fingers briskly typed away codes into her small, hologram tablet. It was late. She could tell by the silence and low glow of the castle lights outside her room. She knew she was tired, but sleep was definitely _not_ an option.  

She knew that her out-of-whack sleep schedule was starting to show on the training deck. Her almost falling asleep during the last simulation battle with Keith was not something she wanted to happen again. He almost couldn’t stop his bayard when she sleepily fell on him during their sparring match.

She knew she was probably letting her team down by not taking those drills seriously, and there were only so many times she could skip out because she had some “programming” to do on the lions. But she just didn’t feel that battling in those simulations were going to get her any closer to finding Matt and her Father. The updates and programs that she stayed up all night scrounging from the Galra tech, on the other hand, would.  

After she set in the last of the codes she scrubbed her eyes with her palms and checked the clock on her monitor that she had set to Earth time. It read 4:03 A.M. She decided that she would move to her bed to focus on another project hoping that she would get tired enough and eventually knock herself out from exhaustion.

She stretched her arms above her head and moved to grab a mass of metal and wires that lay on the ground beside her bed. It was a Rover 2.0 that she had been working on ever since she lost the first one when Sendak and Haxus invaded the castle.

She thought back to that event and how crazy it was that she was able to hold her own for so long. She let out a deep sigh. _See I told those guys I don’t need to train all the time. Or did they just conveniently forget that I was the one that saved Shiro and Lance from Sendak._ She let out a disgruntled huff as her agitation led to her misplacing a wire in Rover 2.0’s main circuit board. “Damn it! Now I need to find the freakin wire trimmers...” Pidge placed Rover 2.0 next to her on the covers as she half hanged over her bed scrounging on the floor for the misplaced tools.

That’s when it hit her. A sudden sharp throbbing in her head made her fall to the ground clutching her skull. “Ouch! What the _Qui_ -”, she was cut off when mumbled speech started to enter her mind.

_“Agh! Please No! Stop, not again. I promise I won’t do it again. Just please don’t send me under! No sto-”_ , the words were cut off by another sharp pain in her head. By now she knew that what she was feeling and hearing was from the Paladin bond. She didn’t have to think twice about who these pains and emotions belonged to.

_Shiro_ , she thought to herself, _He must be having another nightmare._ Pidge decided that she couldn’t just stay here while he struggled through these terrors. She groggily lifted herself off the floor with one hand held to her temple to try to dull the pain a little bit.

When she was outside of his door she could hear shallow grunts and uneven breathing. “Shiro? Shiro, it’s me Pidge,” she knocked on his door, “Please open up.” There was no reply just more mumbled talking. “Shrio? Shiro please, open the door!” She thumped on the metal door louder. Her pounding was met with the beginning of a loud yell.

That was it. She didn’t care if she was teased later for hacking into Shiro’s room. He needed somebody, and he needed them now, before he was lost to his mind. Pidge hurriedly re-crossed some wires in the door’s panel control system on the wall. After a few seconds of rewiring the door slid open and she rushed inside.

“Shiro?!” She was met with darkness as her eyes tried to hurriedly readjust to the new environment. It didn’t take long for her to find Shiro thrashing in his bed with the sheets strewn everywhere. “Shiro! Shiro, wake up it’s only a dream. No one’s going to hurt you.” She approached his bed slowly so as not to spook him. She held out her hand to lightly shake his shoulder to try to wake him from his nightmare. Bad Idea.

She was on the ground faster than she could say _Quiznack._ The breath was knocked out of her as Shrio’s room turned upside down. Her eyes spinned as she tried to reorient herself. That’s when she felt the hand around her neck and the heat from the glowing hand in front of her face. She tried to move her body but she was pinned down by Shiro’s weight. “Shiro!,” she gasped with whatever remaining air she had from the hand that was getting tighter around her neck. “Shiro! Stop! It’s me Pi-” She was cut off by the strong hand around her neck.

“You can’t get me now, can you witch.” Shiro’s breathing was heavy and his eyes were slightly glazed over. “Now let’s see who likes getting put under!” He thrust his activated hand towards Pidge’s face.

She realized she wasn’t able to dodge fast enough as the awful stench of burnt flesh met her nostrils. Her stomach curled at the smell and the edges of her vision started to blur from the lack of oxygen from her lungs. _No, stop! Please, somebody! Help Me!!!_

“Shiro,” she tried one last time to pull the man from the depths of his flashback. She shut her eyes tightly and thrashed around trying to dishevel the man on top of her. The grip around her neck only tightened.

“Stop struggling you druid.” Shiro pulled his hand back for another blow.

_No! Please stop. Help! Somebody help!_ Pidge’s vision was starting to fade from the lack of air when she heard another voice.

  
“Pidge!!!”


	2. Confrontation

Pidge couldn’t feel any of her limbs. All she could feel was cold.  _ Heh, at least i’m not dead… maybe.  _ She couldn’t really tell. She felt as if she was floating in a weird in-between. She decided to ignore it as the pull of sleep washed over her. 

*****

Shiro paced back and forth in front of the healing pods. He was accompanied by Lance, Hunk, Keith, Coran, and Allura. Lance and Hunk were bickering about what exactly Hunk’s relationship with a very special Bulmeran was, while Keith slightly leaned against Pidge’s healing pod, eyes constantly watching Shiro’s every movement. The two Altean’s kept their distance from the Paladins as they read the very tense situation in front of them. 

Shiro cleared his throat and stopped pacing. “Allura, do you know when Pidge will be released from the healing pod?” Shiro turned to the princess and raised his eyebrows expectantly. 

Keith glanced at Shiro and huffed in frustration. “Huh, that’s rich coming from you.”

Hunk read the situation immediately and stopped bickering with Lance. “Keith, stop. You know it wasn’t-” He was cut off from a raised hand from Shiro,

“No Hunk, Keith is right. I hurt Pidge,” he sighed deeply, “and there’s nothing I can do right now to make it better besides be here when she wakes up and hope she’ll forgive me for my actions.”

Keith angrily fixed his jacket and faced the opposite direction as he leaned on her healing pod. “What if she doesn’t want to see your face?” Keith spat.

Allura couldn’t take anymore. “Paladins! Stop this immediately! This is one of the times we need to be together and bond as a team and try to sort out the problem we are faced with. We cannot waste it bickering with one another.” She sighed and rubbed at her temples. She looked to Coran for some input in this tense situation.

Coran waggled his mustache and looked to his monitor. “Hmm,” he cleared his throat, “Well according to the readings our little number five should be done any minute now. So you guys shouldn’t get your tails in a bunch. You seem more tense than a herd of yelmors trying to-”

“Coran.” Allura cut him off from his bad analogy before the atmosphere in the room became more tense and awkward. 

Shiro began to return to his pacing when he was cut off by the sound of Keith’s voice. 

“You didn’t see her eyes…” Keith’s form had shifted slightly towards the group while his own eyes were shadowed by his bangs. “She was so scared. I felt it too.” Keith grasped his shirt above his chest. “Here. The bond made it feel like there was a freakin’ active volcano in my chest. It burned so bad. It still kinda hurts now. I can only imagine what she...”

He turned towards Shiro. “And you still wouldn’t stop huh?” He put his full attention on the older man. “You could have killed her and now you just wanna be here when she wakes up as if nothing’s happened?! The team trusted you! I trusted you!  _ Pidge _ trusted you! ” Keith lunged forward and grabbed Shiro’s collar. “Well?!” 

Everyone else in the room was frozen still in shock as they watched the scene in front of them. 

Shiro was speechless. There was nothing to say. He was ashamed that he had let himself go and because of his lack of self control he had hurt the one person he vowed himself to protect above all else. 

“Keith I-” His words were cut off with a fist to his jaw. Shiro fell backwards, more from shock than the strength of the punch, and started rubbing the afflicted area in small circles with his hand. “Yeah, probably deserved that…” When he looked up from his position he was met with Hunk’s hand being held out to him and the sight of Lance struggling to keep Keith back from the older Paladin. 

“Jesus Christ Keith!” Lance held the other Paladins arms up and against his chest to keep him from jumping the other man again. “Get a hold of yourself man! It wasn’t Shiro’s fault. Stop making this whole thing worse than it needs to be!”

“Worse!!” Keith thrashed violently. “If I hadn’t shown up when I did we would be having a freakin’ funeral right now! When I got there…” He went silent and his eyes filled with rage. “Fine! You know what? Freakin’ fine.” He shrugged out of Lance’s grasp and shoved his hands into his jacket pockets. “I’m heading to the training deck.” 

As soon as his foot stepped into the direction of the exit to the infirmary he heard a soft whoosh that was all too familiar.  “Pidge…” 

He turned around as he watched the others gather around her small form in Hunk’s arms. 

*****

Pidge didn’t realize when she was released from her cold slumber, only that she was now embraced in something soft and warm. She mumbled softly to herself as she felt an annoying nudging on her shoulder.  _ Stupid Lance,  _ she thought,  _ Won’t even let me sleep for a few minutes. _ She rubbed her eyelids trying to clear her fuzzy mind. “Huh, guys…” she blinked a few times and looked at the six pairs of eyes staring back at her, “why does everyone look so frazzled?”

The sigh of relief that went through the room confused her as she tried to put the situation together. She soon realized that the strange vibrations she was feeling in her body was actually Hunk chuckling while he was holding her, glad that she was safe and healed.  

“You were hurt,” he didn’t dare elaborate further, “and were in one of the pods and everyone was waiting for you to get out.” He let a small grin escape his mouth as he tried to make the smaller Paladin feel more comfortable in her confused state. 

“Oh,” Pidge shrugged her shoulders, “makes sense. Well thanks for waiting guys!” she let out one of her signature toothy grins. “Well I feel as fit as a pack of yelmors!” She giggled at her own joke and looked to Coran to see him sharing a small chuckle with her. 

“Oh, here you go Pidge.” Lance handed her the round glasses she always wore. 

“Thanks Lance.” She went to adjust the frames to her face when she felt long uneven skin that ranged from the tip of her left cheek bone up to her left ear. “Ah! What the heck is on my face?!” 

“Hold on Pidge let me get you a mirror.”  

Allura returned with the said object and let out a disappointed sigh to the younger Paladin. Pidge stepped out of Hunk’s arms so she could more comfortably examine her face with the mirror. 

“I’m so sorry Pidge. Our technology may be advanced, but since the wound was administered by something so hot, and so quickly, the tissue must have immediately sealed and scarred over. The pod may have been able to fade the wound slightly but, the healing pods cannot, unfortunately, do anything about scar tissue.”

Everyone took in a deep breath at the gasp Pidge let out as she looked at herself. “Well at least no one is going to confuse me with Matt anytime soon.” She poked at her new scar, softly running her fingers across it. “And it kinda looks cool, I guess?” 

“Really Pidge?” Keith was getting agitated. “That’s how you react to something as permanent as a scar? On your face?!” He took the mirror away from her drawing her attention to him. “That’s it?! Shiro almost-”

“Stop it Keith.” Pidge looked him square in the face. “I don’t blame Shiro for any of this. It was just an unfortunate series of events. That’s it.” She let out a breath. “And besides I was gonna get a scar sooner or later. I’m a member of Voltron and with the amount of fighting we do I’m surprised I haven’t gotten one already.” She shook her head to stop her rambling. “What I’m trying to say is that I’m not mad at Shiro, and that if I’m not, nobody else should be. And, that if I had the choice whether or not to do this again I would choose yes every time. Shiro is my teammate and I, as long as everybody else, should do all that they can to help one another.” 

Keith still wasn’t buying it and was about to protest again when Hunk cleared his throat. “Well Pidge, I know what those healing pods can do to a person’s appetite. I bet you’re starving right now!” He playfully nudged her shoulder with his elbow. “Why don’t we go to the kitchen and I’ll make you a special food goo surprise. How bout it?” 

Pidge’s eyes lit up at the sound of food. “Can you make anything that tastes like peanut butter cookies?” She tugged on his shirt sleeve as they started to make their way to the kitchen. 

“Hmm… I don’t know Pidge but I can try!” Hunk rotated his shoulder to ready himself for the battle he was about to face with the goo machine. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: leave it to Hunk to make awkward situations better!


	3. Negligence

After her light snack with Hunk, Pidge decided to wander around the castle to see what the other Paladins were up too. 

Hunk was obviously still in the kitchen trying to conjure up some goo that tasted remotely like peanut butter. He had failed in the task earlier so they had to settle for regular goo for their snack. 

Lance was probably in his room taking his mid-day nap with some light music and a facial mask. Pidge had walked in on him once and swore she had seen an alien in Lance’s clothing. She decided not to check wanting to save her eyes from the sight. 

Pidge had searched around the castle for Shiro and Keith but just couldn’t seem to find them. “Huh, they might be on the training deck. That’s the only place I haven’t looked yet.” 

To her surprise when she got there the deck was empty and there was only the faint glow of the control panel to the battle simulator. “Huh, that’s odd.” She would have thought for sure that the other two would have been here. But even though she didn’t see them, Pidge still thought that she should look around just in case. 

As she looked down to the simulation area she got a weird feeling in her chest. It was a mix between guilt and pity. 

She was angry at herself that she skipped out on so many practices with the team. Maybe if she practiced more… Her hand lifted up to the scar on her cheek.  _ No, _ she thought to herself,  _ I can’t go there.  _ But feelings of weakness were starting to fill her mind. 

_ If I was stronger I could be there for Shiro. I could protect him from whatever monsters he’s facing. I could… I could show him that he doesn’t need to be strong all by himself, that he doesn’t need to protect me all the time.  _

With a frustrated groan she walked down to the simulation area. 

_ I’m not practicing because I think I’m weak,  _ she told herself,  _ I’m just letting off steam.  _ She slapped her cheeks with her hands as she tried to clear her mind.  _ I am a valuable member to this team and I can’t let myself think otherwise.  _

She stepped into the open space, let out a deep breath and took her bayard from the belt around her waist. She didn’t have her armor on, but she had seen Keith practice plenty of times without it against the gladiator bot, so she didn’t think twice about it. She took a small synthetic band from her pocket, leftover from one of her mock ups of Rover 2.0, and tied the top part of her hair back so it wouldn’t get into her eyes. She placed Matt’s glasses to the side so they wouldn’t accidentally fall off and get damaged.  

“Set simulation to intermediate difficulty level seven.” She got into a fighting stance as she saw the gladiator bot slowly come to life. Its eyes took a faint glow and a sword, similar to Keith’s, formed in its metallic fingers.

“Okay,” she said letting out a relaxing breath, “Begin training sequence.” 

******

Keith was sitting on one of the many balconies in the castle and was looking at the scenery of the planet around him. The castle had stopped for slight repairs and to restock on some supplies so they landed on the nearest “friendly” planet.

He let out a deep breath as he saw something akin to an earth dear, but with ten horns and green fur, jump behind a bush at the sight of him. He shoved his hand through his disheveled hair. 

“I just,” he sighed and looked up to the sky, “I just don’t understand why… Shiro is supposed to be the leader of Voltron.” He started motioning with his hands, “Then why on earth would he do that to Pidge? And then not have anything to say for it?!” He held his head in his hands. “I just don’t understand… I thought he was more than that, stronger even…”

Keith tensed when he felt a hand on his shoulder. 

“Hey why ya talkin’ to yourself mullet?” 

The last person Keith was expecting to come up behind him, and last person he wanted to see right now, was Lance. He quickly changed his expression from pensive to serious and immediately turned to leave not wanting to talk about his feelings with his other teammate. 

“Hey! Why are you walkin’ away from me!” Lance hurried to follow Keith from the balcony back  inside the castle. “Hey wait up!”

“I don’t want to talk about it with  _ you. _ ” Keith kept his steady pace ahead.

Lance’s eyebrows quirked together. “What’s  _ that _ supposed to mean!”

“It means I don’t want to talk to you, Peabrain.”

Before Keith could turn the corner he was up against the wall. Lance's hands holding his arms above his shoulders and the other paladin’s face dangerously close to his. 

“What are you-!”

“Stupid.” Lance’s face got closer. “You shouldn’t have punched Shiro.” 

“But he frickin’ hurt Pidge and now she has a freakin’ scar! Aren’t you upset?!” Keith yelled making Lance withdraw his face a little bit. 

“Of course I’m mad you moron!” He let out a breath to calm himself down and looked Keith straight in the eyes. 

“But you also have to realize that Shiro’s only human,” his gaze never wavered focusing on the gray flecks in Keith’s eyes, “he’s been through alot and that stuff sticks with someone. He doesn’t want us to realize it... but there’s part of him that’s broken, Keith.” He looked down. “And he needs us now more than ever to help him heal. I think that’s what Pidge was getting at when she said that she would choose to do it again.” He looked back up, “Keith, I know you look up to him and… he’s-he’s my hero too, but we can’t make him be someone he’s not. We’re a team now, and we have to help each other, we’re a family.”

Keith didn’t realize he was crying until he felt his arms fall from above his head and Lance’s soft hand wiping a tear from his cheek. 

“I-I…” 

“Come here,” Lance opened up his arms and Keith practically fell into them as he started to wail into Lance’s shoulder, “It’s okay Keith. It’s okay.”

Lance slowly ran his hand through Keith’s hair as he started to calm down. 

“I really am a monster….” Keith whispered into Lance’s jacket. 

“What?”

Keith pushed Lance away and turned to walk down the hall. “Nothing. I need to go find Shiro.”

Before Lance could say anything else, Keith was already out of sight. 

“But I held you in my arms….”    
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Lance is smarter than he lets on..


	4. Comfort

Keith was practically running towards Shiro’s room when he heard someone clear their throat behind him. He skid to a stop and quickly turned his head towards the sound.

It was Shiro… and he looked awful. There were bags under his eyes and his posture was slightly slumped.    

The Black paladin shifted awkwardly and rubbed the back of his head with his cybernetic arm. If someone were to ask how he was feeling right now he would probably have a laundry list ready of negative adjectives and feelings. To put it simply, he was utterly exhausted: emotionally and physically.

He was full of guilt, shame, and anger. His list of people he needed to apologize to just kept growing. He thought it might be better to settle it with Keith before he even thought about getting to Pidge.

_That_ would be another battle in and of itself.

“Hey Keith, is it okay if I talk with you for a moment?” Shiro moved to stand next to Keith so they could walk as they talked. 

“Yeah s’fine I’m…” Keith turned away, slightly ashamed from what he had done, making his nervous apology come out as a jumble of words.

“I’m sorry Keith, what was that?” Shiro stopped walking and turned towards the younger man.

“I said I’m sorry for punching you!” Keith clenched his fists to his side and then rushed Shiro with a vice-like hug. This took Shiro for surprise as he stood frozen by Keith’s actions, his arms stuck to his sides and his erratic breath wisping through Keith’s hair.

“I’m sorry okay?” He buried his face into Shiro’s chest. “It’s just that I-I, I can’t…”, his words became slightly muffled by the fabric of Shiro’s shirt, “I couldn’t accept, that that was you. Someone so weak and broken I just couldn’t accept that that was you!” Keith let out a breath as he felt Shiro’s racing heartbeat through his chest.

“But, I know what you’ve gone through and should’ve never said or done any of those things. I shouldn’t have put this pressure on you to be something you’re not just because I wanted you to be.” He hugged tighter as emotion rushed to his face “I know it wasn’t your fault. I know that. I’m sorry!”

Shiro was lost for words at Keith’s apology. He didn’t know what to say because, truthfully, he was there for the same reason. He had lost control and no one else should have to carry the burden of his mistakes.

“Yeah, it’s okay Keith. I know. I’m sorry too.” Keith pulled away running his jacket sleeve across his face trying to wipe away his tears. Shiro gave him a firm comforting squeeze on his shoulder.

“I know what you mean when you said you thought I was stronger,” he sighed, “and truthfully, I thought so too.”  He looked Keith straight in the eye and then looked down to his prosthetic arm, clenching and releasing the cybernetic fist.  

“I never imagined that my weaknesses,” he looked down in shame, “would get so out of hand, that I would hurt Pidge, or any of you for that matter. I-I just want to be there for all of you, but you also have to understand that I’m only human,” he chuckled flexing his Galran prosthetic, “even though it may be hard to believe.”

He sighed, “Keith, I understand that you trust me, and I’ve done some things that don’t really deserve that trust, but I just want you to know that I’m not angry with you and that if you ever want to talk with me about anything you can. Okay?”

Keith sighed and faced Shiro, “Yeah I understand,” he nervously ran his hands through his hair, “I was just really worried about Pidge. She’s been through so much, we all have really. I just want her to know that we’re all here for her, we’re a team, and that she doesn’t have to hide her feelings just because she’s a girl. You know?” He looked to Shiro for support, “If she’s ever angry, frustrated, scared,” He counted them off on his fingers, “I want her to tell us. I just feel that she’s so passive all the time about her personal stuff. It makes me worry y’know, that she’s not taking care of herself…” 

Keith blushed as he realized just how much he was rambling about the smaller Paladin. “Aw great, her rambling must be rubbing off on me.”

“I know what you mean Keith. She’s important to all of us.” Shiro shuffled a little uncomfortably then, looking down for a split second, then looking to the red paladin. “I was actually looking for her when I bumped into you. Do you have any idea where she might be?”

“Hmm that’s a good question have you checked her room, lab, and Green’s hangar?” Keith showed three fingers to the older man.

“Yes all three and with no sign of her.”

“Hmm have you tried the training deck?”

“No, but I guess it’s worth a shot.”

The two Paladins turned down the hall and began walking towards the training deck.

******

She couldn't remember when she had started the training sequence and all that was rushing through her veins was to _survive_.

Whenever she was in one of the training simulations she got into this zone. It was a place where she felt invincible and _strong_. Like she didn’t need any of the guys there to help her. And she loved it.

Her brow was sweaty, strands of her hair falling into her face, and she was panting but her adrenaline was driving her through, pushing her farther and farther.

Right now she was facing two of the robo gladiators each with a longish sword in their hands.

She was fast and graceful as she dodged their blows. Swiveling and rolling as she took out one of their legs in a quick role, the bot soon exploding into soft blue pixels.

The other was slightly more difficult to pin as it kept slashing every time she tried to advance. She ducked as the bot’s blade came dangerously close to her face. She spun quickly, her bayard coming to rest under the chin of the robot, the gladiator’s blade still too far away to gain back their ground. She had won. The bot disappeared in a flurry of pixels.

Her breaths came in deep gasps as she lay on the floor of the training deck, a bead of sweat following the curve and shape of her neck falling slowly into the dip of her clavicle.  

Little did she know there were two spectators to her little training activity. Keith and Shiro were in the observation deck struck in silent awe of the paladin below them.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took so long to post this chapter. School has been really strenuous and I haven't had free time in ages! I don't really know how I feel about this chapter so tell me how you feel about it... ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


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